Prioritizing a Healthy Mindset

Sometimes we get too caught up in our heads, and sometimes we just need 5 minutes to stop, release, and tackle just today’s problems, rather than the problems of yesterday, tomorrow, and the rest that is yet to come.

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I’ve been reflecting on the past as of late. Nothing in particular has sparked this trip down memory lane – well, that’s what it usually feels like – nothing has triggered the ‘sudden’ emergence of memories.

As I write this, I’m not quite sure where I'm taking it, to be honest. Recently, I spoke with someone who suggested free writing as a good technique for journaling. I told her I love journaling (when I can be asked) so I entertained the idea. I nodded as she enthusiastically promoted the idea of letting words flow from my head to paper, not thinking too much about it, and really emptying any thoughts into a visual document. That’s where she lost me. I side-eyed the invisible camera, smiled, and brought my attention back to her to tell her that she was talking to the wrong person. I cleared my throat, softened my voice, and politely told her, “Mmhh, no, thanks.”

As someone who’s a chronic people pleaser, that was the fastest I’ve ever said no to something. It didn’t take her long to procress the rejection because she didn't hesitate when she grinned, and that’s when I knew she was crazy. (She’s not). She dismissed my poorly defended refusal, handed me a ginormous canvas and an obnoxiously large black pen, and told me to write. 

“Just for 5 minutes, trust me, and then that’s it. I won’t suggest the idea again,” she lied right through her sweet, gentle smile. I’ve seen body language like this before, this was the smile of a person who always got what they wanted – and she did. She left, ‘giving me space’, which was both satisfying and dreadful. I signed, gripped the pen between my fingers, and stared at the blank sheet. The tools I have used day in, and day out seemed overwhelming and larger than life. Was it the thought of doing something I didn’t want to do that scared me, or the fact that the thoughts I have were safer, unjudged, and better in my head? For someone who intermittently journaled here and there, I didn’t know where to begin. 

“This is so stupid,” I thought and rolled my eyes. To really stand my ground on how much I didn’t want to do this, I rebelled and scribbled it on the sheet. There. The idea was ludicrous. I scribbled that too. A waste of time. Scribbled that too. She can’t make me do this. Scribbled that also. There, there and there. And there it really was. The thoughts that I was feeling, went from my head to the paper. 

So, okay, it wasn’t the end of the world (still questionable outside this context), and it wasn’t such a ludicrously stupid-waste-of-time idea that I couldn’t do.

As I stared at the wonky letters, the sentences got longer, the words got more descriptive, and the page was no longer empty. I stared at the A4 paper and wondered how 5 minutes of thought, containing useless commentary, random ideas and feelings filled this space that once felt impossibly big. I could write more if I wanted to, and truthfully, I didn’t want to stop. That got me thinking (ironically) – all the thoughts that we have roaming around our head, how does it all fit? From work objectives to chaotic shopping lists that never end, to awkward conversations we wish weren't so awkward or arguments we keep redrafting after coming up with better points – how do we fit it all? From little decisions to big ones, from strategies to impulses, from guilt to pleasure – how do we fit it all?

I don’t want to get into the science of the way our stream of consciousness works because I think it’s complicated enough. Now that I’ve literally done the same for this post, and simply just wrote what came to mind, I now know the direction of this piece: It can be hard to prioritize a healthy mindset.

It literally is – human nature. As I mentioned earlier, I have been reflecting on the past, and it isn’t negative, nor is it positive, simply a series of events that have or haven’t impacted me. Like, why did Kanye change his name to Ye? Where tf is Tupac? (To be fair, if I was him – and for clarity, I’m not – I wouldn’t want to conform to the identity and glorification the world has given me in my absence). Why did Thomas J. from the movie ‘My Girl’ go back for that silly ring?!

I digressed. Clearly, the seriousness has been put aside in my message, but we all know what I’m trying to say amid my attempted humour. After tackling the copious obstacles day-to-day life throws, the last thing I would want to do is ponder life harder. But should you choose to do so, I urge you to try the 5-minute writing exercise. No music, no distractions – just you, a pen, a paper, and a will to try. 

There are a lot of things happening in this world that should be a home for us, and sometimes, it can be hard to understand why it doesn’t feel like that. Why certain things happen, why life is the way it is, and what little control we may have. But I think the one thing we should try and ponder is how we can prioritize a healthy mindset, and to do that, perhaps we just need to learn how to clear our heads, even if it is for 5 minutes a day. Sometimes we get too caught up in our heads, and sometimes we just need 5 minutes to stop, release, and tackle just today’s problems, rather than the problems of yesterday, tomorrow, and the rest that is yet to come. It is circumstantial, I know, but every little does help. I’m no expert, though, just a girl with a QWERTY keyboard.